Silver Bullet
by TimeLord1
Summary: The Doctor and Rose arrive in the town of Forks, Washington. Things happen. PLZ REVIEW COS I NEED REVIEWS TO LIVE!
1. Chapter 1

The TARDIS materialized in a forest. The sky was overcast, and the sun didn't look like it knew how to shine in this part of the world, where things were wet and rainy and depressing all the time. Sort of like a song by Morrissey, but not. Rose and the Doctor stepped outside and had a look around.

"Forks, Washington," the Doctor said, walking a distance from the TARDIS with his hands in his pockets. "Rainiest place in the United States, or so they say. Not far from here is a Quileute reservation, and a beach called La Push, which sounds like the name of a bad French-Canadian disco group from the 1970s."

"Boy," Rose said leaning against the tardis doors. "If I were an awkward, clumsy but beautiful emo girl from Arizona, I'd be miserable if I had to move here because my mom was marrying a minor league baseball player and I wanted them to have some alone time together."

"Me too," the Doctor said. He turned to Rose with a smile. "You smell that? Take a whiff of the air."

Rose smelled. "Yuk! What is that?"

The Doctor sniffed the air again. "Noxema, cheap drugstore fragrance and pheromones. The unmistakable odor of teen angst. The air is thick with it. There must be a high school nearby. Tardis brought us here for some reason, let's go find out what it is." he offered her his hand and she gratefully clasped it gratefully, and they walked along the wooded path together for quite some time. It was a beautiful place, if a bit damp, and Rose thought she could be very happy living here, if only she could find the right man to make her life complete…as soon as humanly possible, because she was beginning to feel that her life lacked meaning or importance because there was no official man in it. After all, what is a woman without a man? Nothing, really.

She was just starting to think she'd better crumple to the dirt and have a long lie-down in the leaves over her lack of man-support when a fast-moving blur knocked her to the ground and the Doctor disappeared.

"DOCTOR!" Rose shouted, getting to her feet. The forest was silent, except for the sound of a struggle in the distance. She ran toward the sounds and found the Doctor pinned beneath the most handsome man Rose had ever seen since looking at the Doctor. He was pale and so handsome Rose could hardly believe her eyes. He was beautiful. He was also biting the Doctor on the neck and drinking his blood. The Doctor cried out in pain and tried to force the incredibly handsome, tousle-haired man-beauty off of him. Rose wished she was in the Doctor's position, except for the biting and the bleeding.

"Get off of him!" She cried, but did nothing to stop the attack because that was what women in this universe were supposed to do. After a moment, she remembered herself and picked up a branch and swung it, striking the angelic killer upside the head. He turned towards her, snarling, and lunged. Rose realized she was going to die at the hands of an angel-faced monster.

"Rose!" the Doctor cried from his spot on the ground. He was clutching the side of his neck, trying to staunch the bleeding, when the poison hit his bloodstream. He roared with agony and began twisting and wrything in the dirt, helpless to save her. Which was bad because Rose was essentially helpless as well, thanks to her having a vagina.

But then, her gorgeous attacker paused. His incredibly beautiful eyes turned to the southeast and he sniffed the air with his perfect nose. As Rose watched, his eyes turned from red to yellow, making him look even more exotically pretty.

"Spider monkey," he whispered, and disappeared into the trees.

Rose ran to the Doctor's side and grabbed his hand. He was still in the throws of agony and didn't react to her presence. He bucked and twitched, grinding his teeth and shivering as the poison worked its cruel work. After what felt to Rose like a thousand years, he stilled. His hand felt like a snow cone shaped like a hand in hers, and his sweat was like droplets of ice spilling onto the forest floor. He sat up like he was spring-loaded and looked right through her.

"Rose, the Doctor gasped. "My entire biological makeup has shifted. Look at me what do you see?"

Rose sat back stunned. "You're so _pail_." She touched his cheek and the Doctor took a deep breath through his nose, smelling her hungrily. "You're skin is ice cold, colder than it usually is." She gasped. "Your eyes! They've changed color from luscious brown to…blood red."

As they stared at one another, the sun broke through the clouds and a beam of light hit the Doctor. Wherever the sunlight touched his skin sparkled and twinkled like he was covered in spray glitter.

"It looks like your made out of diamonds," Rose breathed, reaching out to touch him. "You're beautiful."

"No," he said, taking another deep sniff of her. "I'm a predator now. I've moved to the top of the food chain, Rose. And I want to eat you in ways I've not wanted to do before. Do you know what I am now?"

She swallowed. "I do."

"Say it! He demanded."

"Vampire."

"Vampire Time Lord," he corrected.

He and Rose looked at one another the way people do when something spooky has just happened.


	2. Chapter 1 Notes

Author's Notes: Silver Bullet Chapter 1

I have often been a clumsy, awkward emo girl from Arizona, and in those times I wished someone would move me to a wet place so I could meet a vampire and fall in love. Instead, I started watching Doctor Who and thought it would be nice to be Rose Tyler, AND TO MAKE THE DOCTOR A VAMPIRE.

SO I DID IT.

This song by "The Manhattans" properly sums up the love the Doctor and Rose have for one another, which will be tested by the events in Forks.

Honey you are my shining star

Don't you go away

WAnna be right here where you are

Until my dying day. Yeah, baby!

So many have tried, tried to find

A love like yours and mine

Mmm-hmmm

Girl don't you realize how you hypnotize

Make me love you more each time?

Yeah, baby.

Sometimes I like to spell vampire with a y. Not like so it spells "vampirey" but "vampyre". I wish there were more reviews on this story. Not having enough makes me feel rancid.


	3. Chapter 2

Rose couldn't stop staring at how beautiful the Doctor was in the sunlight. "You're beautiful in the sunlight," she whispered, reaching again to cup his icy cheek. He closed his eyes, tragically, which just made him more beautiful, because of his long David Tennant lashes brushing against his now glittering vampire cheeks.

"Stop it," he cried with a pained voice pushing her hand away. "Don't touch me. You smell like heroin."

"What?"

"Never mind."

"What are we going to do?" Rose asked. "I mean, do you have to turn back? Because you really look good like this." All she could think about was marrying him and making herself complete by being Mrs. The Doctor.

The Doctor scowled, which only enhanced his twinkling gorgeousness. "Could we focus on something beyond the fact that I'm now both pretty and disco fabulous in sunlight? I'm a killer – a predator – a murderer – a monster! This is tragic and sad, and the state of my complexion should be the least of our worries."

"I'm sorry Rose said. Looking at the grass.

"What do we know about vampires," the Doctor asked?

"Wait a second!" Rose cried. "I know! I know this! I saw this movie once, called _**'The Lost Boys.'**_ You're only half-vampire now, until you make your first kill."

"Which I could do right this second," the Doctor muttered hungrily into the back of his hand.

"How's that?" Rose asked.

"Which I'm not going to do at all," the Doctor said, grinning and showing her for the first time the fangs that had grown in to replace those one teeth by the front teeth, but like two behind. Rose felt a flare of sexyness in her stomach at the sight of him so transformed.

"You're so beautiful," she said with a sigh.

"Stop it!" he shouted. "I can smell your sex pheromones rising. Do you find me attractive like this?"

"Did becoming one of the hungry undead make you stupid?" Rose asked. "What have I been saying?"

"Come here," he said, grabbing her roughly and pulling her into a rough embrace. He parted his soft, sparkling lips and kissed her, letting his new fangs brush against her mouth in a way that was both threatening and arousing. She wanted him to bite her right then, to turn her into one of him so they could be together forever and she'd never have to think for herself again. Suddenly the Doctor broke the kiss and threw her hard against a tree.

"I did it," he breathed, clutching his chest. "I didn't bite you. I'm stronger than I thought."

"I'm not, Rose said, running back for another kiss. The Doctor meant to push her gently aside, but his new vampire strength made him launch her into the treetops. She crashed to the leaves and stayed there, watching him move towards her with his new, graceful vampire speed.

"You can't," he said. "I'll bite you. You'll turn into a vampire, and then what?"

"Why does there have to be anything after that?" Rose asked. "We'll be together. That's kind of the point of being alive, finding someone and being with them."

"Knock it off!" The Doctor cried. "Stop it, or I won't let you look at my sparkles any more."

Rose grabbed her head. "I'm sorry, Doctor, I don't know what's come over me. I'm not like this. It must be all the rain and the angst in the air."

"It's all right," he said, putting his arm around her. I could smell her, her gorgeous heroin scent filling my lungs. My respiratory bypass, undamaged by my shift into vampire form, held on to her scent like a child's hand clutching at the last broken rose of summer. I could have pulled her hair back and plunged my teeth into her neck at any point, but I didn't. Why? Because I loved her, even though I couldn't say so out loud. I wanted her, in every sence of the word. To love her, to devour her, to make her mine for all eternity. It would be rather convenient, Rose being a vampire. She could excuse the sparkling as too much shimmery body lotion, and she'd never die. Handy, that. Maybe we _could_ be together. I should just go ahead and do it.

He reached his hand out to her. "Come with me."

He lifted me onto his back like I was some sort of human rucksack, and the Doctor began to run. Now, we had run together before in the past, but never like this. This was like running at a really high rate of speed. Things were going by so FAST, and it was a really quick trip before he stopped running and our trip together was over. I hated to slide down off his back, because I loved being that close to his beauty, but when I saw where we were, I couldn't help but be in awe of even more beautiful things. We were in a meadow, thick with wildflowers and bright with sunlight. He took off his trenchcoat and suitcoat and jacket, showing me his gorgeous, beautiful, diamond-crusted skin, and lead me to the centre of the meadow.

"What do you think of me now?" he asked. "What do you think of your two-hearted alien-turned-vampire almost-but-not-quite-boyfriend _NOW_?"

"I love you," Rose said. "I can't stop looking at you, wanting to be with you, wanting to spend the rest of my life and yours with you taking care of me."

"I want to devour you, and not at all in the romantic way," the Doctor cried, gnashing his sizeable teeth. "I want to rip your throat out and drink your life blood until you're a withered shell."

"Then, do it!" I shouted, spinning in the wildflowers! "Eat me, Doctor!"

"You don't know what your asking," he answered in a brooding sort of tone of voice.

I answered, "Neither do you – you've only been a vampire for less than five minutes."

"How can you look at me and see something good?" he cried. Actually cried this time. Tears. "I was a Time Lord, a hero. Now all I want to do is drink every last drop of your precious blood."

"Do it, then," Rose said. The sun broke through the clouds again and the light from the Doctor's twinkling body was blinding. They stared at one another, so deeply in love they both couldn't hardly stand it. She touched his face. He touched mine.

"How long have I been in love with you," He asked. His red eyes were so pretty.

"As long as I've been in love with you," Rose answered.

I was in pain looking at her. "You are my life now, Rose Tyler. And so," I said. "The hungry guy fell in love with his lunch."

"Stupid lunch."

"Sick, masochistic hungry guy."

They kissed as the sun moved in and out of the clouds, sometimes making them look like a girl making out with a disco ball, sometimes not so much.

"We've got to stop," the Doctor gasped, backing away from Rose and ending up fifty feet away.

"What?" Rose shouted to him from across the meadow.

He closed the distance once more and was sitting beside her. "Rose, I don't want to be a vampire. I want to turn back into my old self."

She shrugged. "Then we have to find the head vampire and kill him or her. Do you think that one that did this to you, that really gorgeous, handsome one, was the head vampire?"

The Doctor was giving her a look. "Gorgeous? Really? Did you think he looked good as he was trying to _rip my throat out_?"

Rose looked at the ground and said nothing. The Doctor rolled his eyes and went to get dressed again.

"No," he said. "I don't think he was the head vampire. Head vampire wouldn't have left me to change like that without offering some sort of orientation."

"What, were you expecting a pamphlet?" Rose asked.

"We've got to root out who the head vampire in Forks is…Or, at least, who the sire is that created the one that we met in the woods. He looked like a young man. No more than a teenager. That means, Rose Tyler, that we are probably going to have to infiltrate what is doubtless the largest and most important building in all of Forks." He slid her onto his back and ran through the forest until they found themselves standing at the crest of a wooded ridge looking down on the aforementioned largest and most important building in town.

Forks High School.


	4. Chapter 2 Notes

Author's Notes: Silver Bullet - Chapter 2

Why won't you answer my emails? I send at least a dozen an hour, and I KNOW you've read them, because I log into your account and check your "read" messages. Stop ignoring me! What is it that I did to make you so angry? Was it the rabbit? The rabbit was too much, but I tried to make up for it. If you would just love me the way I tell you to love me, IT WOULDN'T HURT SO MUCH!

When I was in school, I had classes like "Spelling" and "Gym" and "Other Stuff." It was super hard. I learned about words like "paragraphing" and "run on sentences," but I never bothered with learning what they meant, because it was good enough that I had the words in my arsenal to throw in people's faces to show them just how damn smart I was.

This chapter expresses the full spectrum of my knowledge. Some stories tell themselves. This one didn't. I had to tell it, because I am the only one who can.

Your reviews have made me strong. PLZ keep sending them because only through them and your suggestions can I grow as a writer. What would I do without reviews? I only wish I could get some seriously nasty concrit from someone who really wanted to see me improve. What I need is a severe verbal lashing from a clearly superior intellect who can talk about how stupid I am to build up my writing confidence and make me write Just. Like. Them. Because everyone knows there's only one way to write, and there's only one group on this website that knows how to do it.

Up next in Silver Bullet, we go to Forks High School. I already have my gym uniform on. How about you?


	5. Chapter 3

It was torture saying goodbye to the Doctor when he brought me to the woods at the edge of the school the next morning. We couldn't stop kissing one another, and he couldn't stop sniffing my neck.

"It's only for a few hours," he said, licking my throat like it was an ice lolly. "We can bear the separation. I'll be back with the TARDIS. You find the boy and figure out where he lives, and we'll go kill him and any other vampyres that might be with him, and then I'll go back to being me and we can get out of here."

"You'd better go," I said, pushing him back into the trees. "The sun is coming out."

Even beneath the thick forest canopy, a few beams of sunlight found him and he began to twinkle. The sight of him made Rose want to stay with him for the rest of her life again, just so she could watch him shimmer.

"Go, he whispered nodding towards the school. "Go now and come back to me as soon as you can."

Rose turned to leave, looking back at me reluctantly. I could have dragged her into the trees and bit her right then, but I was still able to resist the vampiric impulses. I wasn't sure when we'd decided that we were boyfriend and girlfriend, but Rose seemed okay with it so I was too. I missed her already.

"I miss you already!" I yelled from the trees.

I turned around to look at him one more time. "I miss you more!"

He watched her leave, clutching a handful of leaves and weeping into the back of his hand. Just out of curiosity, he sniffed it but found that it didn't smell half as good as Rose did. Rose smelled like the most delicious delicacy in the world, made especially just for him. How delicious it would be to tear her jugular vein out of her neck and drink every last drop until she fell, a white and dried husk, to the ground. He loved her so.

As he watched her go into the school, another scent came to him on the breeze and his eyes turned darker red. There was one scent in the universe that could compete with the intoxicating heroin smell of Rose Tyler, and he scrambled back into the woods to go find it.

The psychic paper said my name was Jolie Peacock, that I was a foreign exchange student from England and that was enough for the women in the office. I was given a schedule and my first class was history, which was boring. No sign of the vampire that had attacked my love and turned him into such a beautiful, exotic thing. As if he weren't exotic already, being an alien and all, but now he was like a beautiful painting made out of glitter. And those eyes. Red was his color, to be certain. And those fangs, so eloquently pointy….I realized after several minutes that I'd drawn his picture and written his name all over the pages of my history book.

Rose looked out the window and saw the Doctor standing just outside it, watching her study. She blinked and he was gone again.

Gym class followed history, and Rose didn't see the vampire in their either, but she did make friends with the unexceptional, pale and unfriendly Bella Swan. It was hard to reach her around the throng of male admirers, and mostly all Bella did was look at the ground and make odd sort of grunty, half laughing sounds, but Rose needed her friendship desperately from the moment she laid eyes on her.

Bella introduced Rose to her friends Jessica and the other girl whose name I can't remember, and the four girls ate lunch together in the very fancy cafeteria. No matter how I tried, I couldn't choke down any of my beefy mac. All I could think about was the Doctor and the depth of my endlesslove. The sooner I found that stupid vampire boy, the sooner I could get back to him and we could be together again.

As if on cue, like it was some sort of movie or something, the vampire boy in question walked through the cafeteria, balancing a tray on one hand. It had an apple and what looked like a juice bottle filled with red liquid on it. As he walked past the table where the girls were sitting, the apple fell from the tray and landed in Bella's hands. The vampire boy bent down and took a long, sensual bite of the apple poised on her palm, letting the juice run all over Bella's hands and arms. He handed the tray off to Rose and licked the juice from Bella's skin, and then took the tray again.

"I'm sorry," he said in his sensual voice and walked away hurriedly to sit with the other four pasty teenagers in a corner of the cafeteria.

"Who was that?" Rose asked.

"Edward Cullen," Stephanie said. "Forget it. He's so not into anyone at this school. Believe me, I tried."

Rose was filled with the overwhelming impulse to get up and steak the vampyre boy through the heart with the spoon from her beefy mac, but she knew that the spoon was stainless steel rather than silver, so it would do no good.

"Where do they live?" Rose asked.

"Outside town. They're the foster kids of Dr. Cullen, but like some of them are _together_." Somebody said.

"Address," Rose said. "I don't care who's with whom, I want to know what street they live on."

"Places outside town don't have street names," Jessica said. "Duh."

By the time the Duh had left her mouth, Rose was gone.

Meanwhile…

I was waiting in a corpse of trees for the Doctor to return. It had been so long since I'd seen him, and the wait was killing me. I couldn't go after him, of course, but I wanted to find him. He had been so strange the night before, barely said a word to me. Which was most unusual for him.

He appeared out of the trees and I was so happy to see him. My Doctor. Nobody else's. He'd been changed, and there was a new sort of energy around him but he was endlessly mine.

"Hello sexy," he said as he approached me. "I smelled you from the other end of the woods."

I opened myself to him and he came inside.

He ran his fingers across me as he walked around my heart, caressing everywhere he touched. I was filled to bursting with love for him, no matter what form he'd taken, and to have him showing his love back to me was something I didn't get quite half often enough.

"You're a living thing, you know," he said to me. If I could have spoken, I would have answered, but since I couldn't, I didn't. I waited.

"I'm a vampire now," he said, approaching one of my coral struts. "Do you know what vampires want to do to living things?"

I had a hope in my heart of an answer, but I daren't speak it, especially since I couldn't.

He ran his hands up and down my pillar before opening his mouth wide to show me his new sharp teeth. "We want to do this," he said, and plunged his bite deep into my structure. And. Began. To Drink.

I shuddered, groaning, my Time Rotor grinding up and down with the frantic beating of my enormous and ancient heart. I don't know exactly what substance he was drinking out of me, but the sensation was beyond amazing. I submitted to him, not only because I couldn't actually move without being controlled, but because I wanted it.

Suddenly, just before he'd drained the pillar, he jumped back. "Rose! He cried, and ran out of my doors. He left me, just like that, bitten and already starting to turn. He left me for _her_. I hated him for it. And then I really began to turn.

The Doctor could hear the TARDI's making unnatural, screamy type noises as he ran back to the woods to wait for Rose, but he didn't turn back. He couldn't. He knew what would be waiting there. It would be awful. For him to see. So he didn't. He'd have to look at it later. When there was no choice but to look. Then he'd be helpless. To look. At what he'd done. To the TARDIS. Just then.


	6. Chapter 3 Notes

Author's Notes: Silver Bullet - Chapter 3

I used to have this dog called Rusty.

This story is taking so much out of me, you would not believe. I have to put my feet up every night after writing a chapter, and eat at least three pints of plain yoghurt with crushed up wheat germ in it to calm the upsetedness of my stomach and soul. Even that barely works. Afterwards, I snort a bowl of Sleepytime tea and watch reruns of "The Great Space Coaster" until my mind is totally blown and I'm able to get 15 minutes of sleep before having to get up and start work on the story again.

There was a psuedo-sexual, metafictional buildup of dramatic tension between the Doctor and the TARDIS during "The Seduction Scene," and I hope that my motives were properly conveyed. I was trying to channel Marcel Proust, and Jack Kerouack, and George Orwell. Because I have read a whole bunch of really fancy writers, and that means I'm smart. Because if I can reference things like "Dante's Inferno" when discussing fan fiction, that makes me the most bestest intellectual person that ever was a thinker. Cos I like big words, and I like telling people how smart I am, in between telling bad writers that I vomited all over myself reading their fiction. That's just how smart I am. Also, if I was as smartest as I wanted to be, I would write more video game fanfiction, but I'm just not that sophisticated. I wish I could be Master Chief. Every day I put on the helmet and say my magic words, but nothing happens. I'm still just me, a greasy loser in my bedroom, full of wishing and big words.

Rose was in the cafeteria eating beefy mac.

1.25 pounds of ground beef

2 cans stewed tomatoes

Chopped celery

Chopped onions

Elbow macaroni

Heat up the oil and cook the celery and the onion until nice and soft. Add the ground beef and brown until browned. Dump in the cans of tomatoes and let it cook for a bit. You want a bunch of liquid, because when things are almost done, you throw in the dry macaroni and stir in. Cover and cook until the macaroni is done. Serve with cheese or without. This is kind of like goulash as well, but call it beefy mac and eat it and shut up.


	7. Chapter 4

4

The change was compleat. I was a killer. A monster. A predator. I ran away - from him, from HER, from the whole wet Pacific Northwestern nightmare to a time and a place where I knew I would find love. And a snack.

I materialized inside Torchwood hub, right behind him. I couldn't tell him to turn around, but I didn't have to. He did it. He smelled so delicious I couldn't wait for him to get inside.

"Doctor?" Jack asked getting up from his chair. The Tardis doors opened, but nobody came outside. The first thought that crossed my mind was that something terrible had happened to the Doctor, and the tardis had come to get me to help him. I put on my really good looking overcoat and walked inside.

The doors slammed shut behind me. I turned, and the time rotor began to move and I knew I was being taken somewhere. He walked around the console, calling for the Doctor.

"Doctor?"

There was no answer. Who could answer him? There was only me. He put his hands on me and I took the advantage, no longer able to control myself.

"OUCH!" Jack cried, he tried to jump away from the thing that had hurt his hand, but his hand was stuck to the console. "What the?" He pulled and pulled, but there was no way to escape.

Then the poison hit his bloodstream, and he began to !

The Doctor was waiting for Rose at the trees where he'd last seen her. He knew she was coming, despite there being 3 more hours left in the school day. He could smell her. It was a good thing there wasn't a lot of wind in the area, so all this smelling could happen.

Rose came bounding up the hillside and jumped into the doctors arms and he spun her around. She was happy. He was happy. They were happy together.

"I found him", she said. "He's called Edward Cullen and he lives outside town on a street with no name." They kissed passionately with the news.

The Doctor nodded There's only one road outside town, so they must live there. He's at school now, but they'll be home later, so we'll go later when they're home and slaughter them all so I can turn back into myself and not be this horrible monstrosity anymore!

Just then, Jack Harkness bursted through the bushes to find them. The sun came out and Rose gasped. Jack, too, was now a sparkling, beautiful, red-eyed vampire.

"Jack!" Rose cried.

"Rose!" Jack cried.

"Jack!" The Doctor Cried.

"Doctor!" Jack cried.

"Doctor?" Rose asked.

"The TARDIS!" Jack cried, showing off his sparkly well muscled arms.

"The TARDIS?" Rose asked.

"The TARDIS…" the Doctor, said thoughtfully.

"You too?" Jack asked.

The Doctor frowned. "Other way round."

"Hang on a second," Rose said. "You BIT THE TARDIS?"

"You're a VAMPIRE?" Jack asked!

"Yes and yes!" The Doctor cried, pushing away from his friends. "Don't judge me!"

Rose frowned. "So, everyone get's to be a vampire but me?"

"I don't want to be a vampire!" Jack cried.

"Me either the Doctor cried. "We're going to kill Edward Cullen. That will fix everything."

At least, I thought it would fix everything. I hoped it would. I didn't know for sure. I looked at the Doctor and Jack and wished with all my heart that I could be like them. I looked at Rose and the Doctor and wished with all my heart that we could have met again under far better circumstances. I looked at Jack and Rose and wanted to bite them both.

It was near dark when the three friends found the Cullens's house. It was a huge house, mostly glass and windows, out in the middle of nowhere on a different road with no name than the one the Doctor first thought it was on. The Doctor climed to the top of a tree with Rose on his back and she was now sitting on his shoulders with a sniper rifle.

"There he is Rose said. "Playing the piano and looking gorgeously tragic."

"Blow his brains out," The Doctor said. "I'm getting sick of this vampire schtick."

Rose cited her weapon and fired. By the way, it had a silencer on it so nobody could know where the shot came from. The glass in the piano room shattered and Edward dodged. The bullet. It buryed itself in the piano. The piano shuddered, gasped, and fell dead with a musical thud.

"Dam it!" Rose shouted. "I missed!"

Edward looked out the window in their direction, eyes glowing red with fury.

"What happened?" the kind of skanky looking blonde girl from the movie yelled as she came into the room, holding a bowl of salad. Rose raised the rifle and shooted again. The salad bowl exploded and the blonde chick shuddered, gasped, and, fell, dead, with a less musical thud.

"Whatever your name is!" Edward cried, rushing to the girl's side. He saw the smouldering wound and hissed, backing away. "Silver," he said. Part of me was sad for having killed his sort of sister, but not much of me. I looked down at the Doctor. His eyes glowed red.

"Nothing's changed," He said, sadly, "I'm still a vampire. And your calf is looking very tasty."

"Don't bite!" I cried, pointing the gun at him. It startled him so that he fell out of the tree, me with him. Good thing Jack was with us, and a vampire himself, because he caught us and set us down on the ground without a scratch.

"I got one of them," Rose said.

It was hard to think about what she was saying when she smelled so delicious. Of course, her scent was even more intoxicating to the Doctor (I knew this because we were psychically linked because of him biting the TARDIS and then the TARDIS biting me) I could have bitten the Doctor, too, but he was already one of us so that would do no good. Doesn't mean it wouldn't be fun! Hee hee hee….

We were about to leave when we heard a rustling sound in the bushes. We turned in time to see a bug-eyed scrawny guy with curly hair leap out at us. Rose raised her rifle and fired. The bullet found it's' mark and he collapsed midleap in a heap. We walked over and the Doctor kicked the still form onto i'ts back. Jack checked the body and we all waited. We could hear people calling for Jasper in the distance.

"Dead." He said, looking pleased.

The Doctor ran his tongue over his teeth. "No change," he said sadly. "Still a vampire."

Rose huffed. "One of them has to be the head vampire! And I'm out of bullet's."

The bushes parted and the rest of the Cullenses were standing there. Oh no!


	8. Chapter 4 Notes

In this chapter, I dared to create a new literary form. Experimenting with POV (Or…"pov," as it is pronounced), I have come up with yet another point of view through which the narrative can be expressed. I like to call it "Fourth Person Omniscient Limited." It is the collected experience of a group of related characters all standing together in one place. In this case, the Doctor, Rose and Jack were my FPOLPOV group, and I feel that I was beyond successful with it. I was innovative. The group mentality was expressed in such a way that it felt as if I were seeing Marxism in action. This POV (or "pov" as it is pronounced) would be extremely successful when put into use by people who are in groups a lot, like teams and clubs and friends who tend to hang out together. Look into the use of this POV for "Saved By The Bell" fics, in particular. I give you permission to use it, as long as you give me credit for its creation.

Edward's piano was a difficult character to kill in this chapter. Being a fan of pianos, and having spent several years as a piano myself, it was hard to have Rose shoot and kill the vampire piano, but in the end it had to be done.

You must understand that things must be killed for fiction to have meaning. Nobody cares what happens in a story if nobody is slaughtered in a most horrible and emotionally emotional way. Somebody one time said "Murder your darlings." I take that to mean "Kill off all your characters." But rules are made to be broken, so some will be left alive. But who? WHO? That is for you to read and find out.

What is it you want from me, people? I am but a humble shoemaker, cobbling story shoes out of words for your eye feet to wear. How can you dance all over my dreams the way you do, putting heel marks in them? I am a slave to this story. You will accept nothing but it. So I eat my muselix and I take my lumps and I let you beat my soul into submission because STORY is first. What else is there in life, but perhaps the understanding that eventually, the ice cream man cometh, but he doesn't have the little Snoopy ice cream bars any more. And never will again.


	9. Chapter 5

Interlude Musicale.

Tune: Hello, by Lionel Richie.

I've been alone with you inside my mind, Doctor  
And in my dreams I've kissed your lips a thousand times, Doctor.  
I sometimes see you pass outside my door.  
Hello, is it me you're looking for?

I can see it in your eyes, Rose  
I can see it in your smile  
You're all I've ever wanted, (and) my arms are open wide, Rose!  
'Cause you know just what to say  
And you know just what to do  
And I want to tell you so much, I love you – But I can't. Time Lord restraint forbids it.

I long to see the sunlight in your hair, TARDIS.  
And tell you time and time again how much I care  
Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow, TARDIS!  
Hello, I've just got to let you know

'Cause I wonder where you are, Jack.  
And I wonder what you do at Torchwood  
Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you? Or a lot of people?  
Tell me how to win your heart, Jack.  
For I haven't got a clue  
But let me start by saying, I love you.

Hello, is it me you're looking for, Doctor, Rose and TARDIS?  
'Cause I wonder where you guys all are  
And I wonder what you do when I'm not there.  
Are you somewhere feeling lonely or is someone loving you all? At the same time?  
Tell me how to win your hearts (as applicable)  
For I haven't got a clue, guys  
But let me start by saying I love you all.


	10. Chapter 5 Notes

Chapter 5 Notes.

This chapter was about music. And people not knowing where other people are. Because vampires are sneaky, and so are ninjas. I knew a ninja once. He peeked in people's windows at night to scare them, and then ran away, climbing walls in a puff of smoke.

Which makes me think of the Doctor. He's like a ninja-vampire-pirate-sexbeast with pretty hair and stuff in his pockets. I think his shoes are super neat.

Words are hard, and making stories is harder. But making good stories is even harderer. So I do what I can. This one time, I was at the store and I wanted some Fruit Stripe gum, but the package was all dusty so I didn't get it. I bet vampires get dusty, being around as long as they are.

Up next, more stuff happens.


	11. Chapter 6

This Whole Chapter Is For My Friend Annisag….

SO! Where were we? Oh yes, the Cullens had the Doctor, Rose and Jack CAPTURED. So, back to that.

Edward towered over the Doctor Rose and Jack in the woods there, glaring angrily with anger.

"You shot my piano."

"Sister," Lucy corrected. "They shot our sister. That blonde girl with the eyebrows."

"Yeah," Edward said, looking beautifully tragic in his tragic vampire beauty.

"You are so beautiful," Jack sighed dreamily.

"Stop it," The Doctor Said. "He's a _teenager_."

Jack snorted. "Your mom's a teenager."

Edward was still angry, and his family was still angry too, and they were all standing there, looking angry. Then all of the sudden, a furry brown blur ran up to the group and snatched Rose away! It was horrible! The Doctor tried to run after them, but the Cullens were like "No." and kept him and Jack captured, just standing there and screaming for Rose, but she wasn't coming back because she'd been captured by something that ran way and she couldn't hear them anymore anyways.

So, this huge fight broke out amongst the Cullens and Jack and the Doctor. The Doctor was super fast, his Time Lord ness combining with his new vampire nature and making him like super badass. He threw Cullens's against trees and roared all sexy, showing off the fangs that were really quite impressive. Jack was wrestling with Edward, trying very hard to turn it from wrestling into sweet, sweet loving, but nothing doing.

"I'm in love with Bella!" Edward shouted, resisting the urge to kiss back this extremely gorgeous hunk of vampire on top of him. It was hard. Finally he gave in and began making out with Jack.

"Jack!" The Doctor Cried, Throwing The Dad Cullen Into A Wall. "He's a _teenager._"

"You're moms a teenager, Edward said, kissing Jack.

The Doctor stopped, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "That's so not fair."

Then there was this horrible cry, and that Lucy girl – the psychic one, you know? – leapt out of the bushes, headed for the Doctor with a STAKE in her hands! Oh no!

"Oh no!" The Doctor cried.!

But then, before she could steak him, the TARDIS appeared out of nowhere. And the steak meant for the doctor plunged into the TARDIS. It roared with pain, shuddered, and died.

"Noooooo!" The Doctor cried, pulling the steak out, but it was to late. So the Doctor jumped on Lucy and bit her neck, drinking her up until she was dead.

"Hey," the kind of mom woman said. "Stop that! Your our prisoner. Don't keep killing us. We want to play baseball, and you're making it so we don't have enough players."

The Doctor looked at the carnage he had made happen in the last few minutes, avoiding looking at Edward and Jack still making out, because that just made him mad. Several cullens were dead and the tardis was too, and there was just so much waist that he didn't know what to do and Rose was gone too, which made him the saddest of all, so he threw his head back and made a really loud, sad vampire sound into the night sky, that was sparkling like his skin did now, forever lost to be a vampire with the cullenses in this part of the world where they lived and now he had to live too because he had to at least find Rose before he could leave, even though they wouldn't get very far without the TARDIS, so maybe he could become king of the vampires or something. Tragic!

****BREAK****

Rose opened her eyes and saw a bunch of shirtless, tan guys with tattoos standing over her. Her first thought was that she'd woken up inside one of Jack's naughty dreams, but then they started talking, and they were talking to her so she knew she was really there.

"You all right?" One of them asked.

"I'm okay," she said standing, and, brushing, herself off. "Who are you guys? Where's the Doctor? Where's Jack?"

"We don't know who those people are," the one guy said. "But you are supposed to be with us."

"_Why?" Rose asked. What makes you say that about me?_

Your a wolf, the other guy said. I think his name is Fred. "We smell the wolf in you, and now it's going to come out.

They were standing around a fire, and Rose looked into the fire, and the fire looked into her, and the next thing she knew she ran from the fire and stripped off her shirt and turned into a beautiful, pale blonde wolf that threw its head back and howled for the Doctor at the same time he was howling for her. Their howls together mingled and made a sound like harmony but coming from scary monsters. They heard each other, because they're in love, but Rose had to get used to her animal nature and she stopped to smell some skunk wee-wee on a tree, momentarily forgetting about the Doctor.

She was an animal now, just as he was an undead monster thing.

They

Could

Never

Go

Home.

Again!

***BREAK***

"I sense her," The Doctor said to Jack, who was still wrestling around with Edward. "This is really starting to get old, you too."

"He's so beautiful," Edward said. "Who ever wanted that Bella chick when Jack is in the world?"

The Doctor sighed. "Wait till you see him in the sunlight."

Edward and Jack smiled at one another. "Come on spider monkey," Edward said. Jack climbed onto his back and they ran towards the sunrise so they could see each others's beauty in the beautiful meadow.

"Rose is out there." The Doctor said. He looked out the big windows at the Cullens house, because even though he was a prisoner it was kind of a loose prisonership, especially since everybody felt bad that Lucy had killed the Tardis and that Jack and Edward were together which sort of made them all family anyway. Is her name Elsie? It's Alice. Whatever. She's dead now.

That guy that was with her was really sad, and looked at everyone all spooky and then ran away.

Then, there was a knock at the door. The Doctor ran to it, swinging it open only to find this amazingly alluring, incredibly attractive boring looking girl with kind of lank brown hair and no personality standing at the door with her backpack over one shoulder.

"Um, Edward take me school." She mumbled, pulling at her hair and looking at the ground.

"You're fascinating!" the Doctor said. "I'm a vampire. I'm the Doctor. Have you seen Rose?"

"No." She stared at him, her eyes a vacuum into sheer, banal nothingness.

"My God," he sighed, leaning against the doorway. "You're just wonderful."

Standing there, without anything really causing it, Bella fell off the porch and rolled down the hill by the side of the house into a ravine. The Doctor took off his shirt and ran down the hill to help her.

"Am ok," she mumbled, ignoring the Doctor's gorgeous, sparkling pecks. "Where Edward? Need."

The Doctor looked up, past her, and saw the wolf. The blonde wolf with brown eyes that sang to him.

"Doctor," she said. "Look at me."

"I love you," he said. He stepped over Bella, stepping on her hair, and petted Rose on the head, scratching her ears. She licked his hand.

Rose looked into his eyes, but then looked away real quick. "Do you smell squirrel."

The Doctor grinned. "Let's hunt."

"Hey," Bella whined. "Still on ground."

But it was to late. They were gone.

They ran together for a while before they stopped at the edge of a meadow, where Jack and Edward were telling each other how beautiful they were and sparkling all over the place. Rose and the Doctor walked into the meadow, hand in paw, and since the Doctor already had his shirt off and Rose was effectively naked, they began to sparkle as well.

She turned back into a person and they made out, having sex too.

Boy, was Bella mad. And the other wherewolves. And the Cullens'. And the TARDIS's ghost.


	12. Chapter 6 Notes

Kayso. Long time between this last chapter and the notes that I am now writing. Sorries.

Four things need to happen to make a successful chapter:

1. Writing

B. Finishing Writing

III. Reading it

4. Putting it up on line.

I've done all of those for the chapter you just read but probably read some time ago and maybe need a refresher. So stuff happened. Edward and Jack. Bella got stepped on. There was also the Doctor, being a beautiful vampire of beauty.

I'm listening to a band called "Hooters" right now. They had mandolins in they're stuff and all kinds of awesome. You should like them to. Crisco is a real effective thing to have in a pie crust. Here's a face:

XXXX

Xx o o xx

X _ x

X x x x

There's more surprise characters coming soon. You wanna know? You have to scroll down

S

P

O

I

LE

R

S

A

H

E

A

D

D

O

W

N

HE

R

E

T

H

I

S

W

A

Y

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

DON'T LOOK PAST THIS POINT IF YOU DON'T WANT THEM.

Ninth Doctor.


	13. Chapter 7 - Happy birthday Annissag!

How the sound of the TARDIS could be happening when the TARDIS was a dead vampire now was a mystery, and yet there it was. The doors opened and a brawnier, short-haired version of the Doctor dressed in a leather jacket, jeans and sweater came outside, sneering and sniffing the air. Shortly behind him came Rose Tyler, younger and with her kind of fuzzy hair and stuff. They were standing in a meadow, and several beautiful people were twinkling and making out in the distance.

"The Doctor," this Rose said. "Where Are we?"

"Northwestern America, present day," the Doctor Said. "Something's not right here."

One of the couples looked up and the Doctor and Rose and the Doctor and Rose froze.

"Me," the vampire Time Lord said at the sight of himself.

"Who's that bloke runnin' at us?" the still not vampire Doctor said. Asked.

"Me!" Young Rose screamed, pointing at the Bad Wolf Rose that was following the vampire Time Lord Doctor across the meadow.

"That's not you," Nine said, scoughing. "That's some sparkly douchebag with red eyes and ridiculous hair."

"Paradox!" Young Rose shouted, pulling on Nine's sleeve. "Get back in the tardis!"

"What are you on about?" Nine asked. Because that's how British people ask what's wrong or when somebody's being weird or something. I like to write British lines because it makes it seem more authentical.

"The Doctor!" Jack cried, finally looking up from making out with Edward long enough to see what was happening. "Kinky!" Edward got up and ran with everyone else because it seemed the thing to do.

Bella dropped down out of a tree and saw Edward's glitter smeared on Jack's glitter and made a gurgling noise of disappointment. Edward stopped running and looked at her.

"Spider money." He said with love.

"How could you." Bella said with no inflection. "You were…supposed to…love me forever." She collapsed into a pile of leaves and didn't move for the rest of the book.

The Vampire Doctor (aka Ten) was in a frenzy. All he wanted to do was bite himself. What better thing could there be to do with one'self afterall? He arrived at the place where Nine and Other Rose were standing and hissed, showing off his fants.

"Where'd you get those?" Nine asked, smirking. "You get those when I regenerated last time, or are they new?"

"I'm going to bite you…me," Ten hissed.

"You can't," Nien said with a manly manly chuckle.

"Why not? Ten asked?"

"Because if you had, you'd already be a vampire when you became a vampire, and since you weren't it won't happen."

"Don't' get timeywimey with me, Sonny Jim!" Ten expoused, and pounced on Nine. Nine put up a brave fight, and Other Rose put a collar and chain on Bad Wolf Rose so she couldn't intervene, but in the end Bad Wolf Rose peed on Other Rose, Jack made out with Edward some more, and Nine was on the ground, clutching the spurting, sizzling wound in his throat, groaning as he turned into a vampire. But then, Something Happened and Nine tried to regenerate to stop the process, but he only got half way so he was like Christopher Ecclestone but with really great hair and sideburns and skinnyer.

AND A VAMPYRE!

"Fuck!" NineTen shouted, looking at himself. "Look what you did! I'm half you, half me and a fucking vampire, you fuckity fuck!" He turned and went back to the TARdis in a huff.

DOOR SLAM (Lindsay: #Haaaaaay!)

!

but then, it was all confused because The other Vampyres found out about the wherewolfes and the Time Lords and got together in black robes in Italy and decided to take the next flight to Forks and sort this whole situation out. So they took the night flight because seriously that's easier. And that Dakota Fanning girl was there and she kept looking all weird eyed and talking about things nobody knew what she was saying, but she was kind of in charge so everybody pretended to listen, but they were really reading their travel magazines and trying to open their packets of peanuts and not eat any of the flight attendants.

So, then, Bad Wolf Rose went back to the wolves and was like "Hey, where do I sleep?" But nobody knew so she turned three circles and layed down. She was lulled to sleep by the sound of Ten and NineTen fighting in the moonlight. She loved them both so very much, and now they were both vampires and she was the Wolf, and some day she would have to decide whether or not she would kill them or join them…

Meanwhile, Jack the Vampire sneaked up on the other TARDIS and bit it, turning it into a second Vampire TRADIS. The only one that wasn't supernatural was Young Rose, who hid inside the Vampire TARSID and listened to the spaceship groan and howl in the night.

She woked up to find Edward standing in her bedroom, looking tragic.

"I don't know how long I can stay away from you," he said, gripping the doorframe with all his restraint.

"Well shit who the bloody hell are you?" Young Rose demanded.

"I'm Edward," Edward said like she was the stupidest thing he'd ever seen. "I'm a super hot vampire that's in love with you because you're beautiful in your own mysterious way known only to me? And also because you smell like my own personal brand of –"

"Allright, knock it off, weirdo," Rose said. "Get your skinny glittering arse out of my kip before I break your face."

Which was an immense turnon to Edward. He rushed her bed and kissed her. She punched him in the temple, kicked him in the groin and he flew out of her room and out of the TARDIS to find the Doctor and the Doctor to howl with them about his own personal agony in the moonlight. Finally Jack found them as well and with four of them they had four-part harmony so they started singing and, as it turned out, they were pretty good. They sang "There's a Moon Out Tonight" by the Capris. Look it up.

_There's a (moon out tonight) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_Let's go strollin' _

_There's a (girl in my heart) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_Whose heart I've stolen _

_There's a moon out tonight (whoa-oh-oh ooh) _

_Let's go strollin' through the park (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh) _

_There's a (glow in my heart) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_I never felt before _

_There's a (girl at my side) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_That I adore _

_There's a glow in my heart I never felt before (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh) _

_Oh darlin' Where have you been? _

_I've been longin' for you all my life _

_Whoa-uh-oh baby I never felt this way before _

_I guess it's because there's a moon out tonight _

_There's a (glow in my heart) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_I never felt before _

_There's a (girl at my side) _

_whoa-oh-oh ooh _

_That I adore _

_There's glow in my heart _

_I guess it's because _

_There's a moon out tonight _

_Moon out tonight _

_Moon out tonight _

_Moon out tonight _

_There's a moon out tonight_


	14. Chapter 7 Notes

There's a moon out tonight…

Oh, hai. Welcome to my notes. Music is important, and so are feelings. Sometimes music makes feelings feel more like feelings we can understand because they've been set to a tune. Which is why I ended the last chapter with a song. I could totally see the two Doctors, Jack and Edward, their arms around one another, singing all cute and stuff. It made me squee, so I thought I'd share it. Cuteness is important in tragic stories like this one, because it's sad that everyone's turning into a vampire and falling in and out of love and stuff.

You know, it makes me think.

So, then also there's the door slam. That was a shout out to my homie Lindsay. You may know her. But maybe not. In jokes make everyone uncomfortable, except the people who get them, which is why they're neat.

Is this cake still frozen?

That toilet flushes like a wildcat – look out!

Pull on me peg leg, cap'n.

I know you know how to Thanksgiving.

And they made out, a lot.

So, that's some in jokes there. Also there was not much Bella, but do you really need any? Not so much if you ask me. Because she's really a dud and you can write about her by not writing about her, because she's kind of invisible and that's the point. But now she's out lying in the leaves feeling sorry for herself because the man who defined her existence has run off with Captain Jack. Isn't that just the way things go?

More coming soon. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ANNISSAG!


End file.
